finding grace the hard way Weblog

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So far….

Last evening, Dave and I took a long walk.  We always think clearly while we walk.  We are definite that we are ready to relocate.  There is a lot to consider.  Joel is a major consideration.  But he is so wonderfully cheerful and flexible that we are confident he will end up fine.  A friend of mine came to Champaign with a son with some limitations and she wishes at times she had stayed where she was.  The services were much better for an adult with special needs where she came from.  Joel will be fine.  He is part of our needs that God is aware of and concerned about.  I have no doubt.

I feel sad about moving away from Wilson and Anne and Zac.  All of them are doing grown up things that are moving them forward and while they don’t “need” me so much as a mom any more, they do very much need me at times.  And when they do, they really do.  But, again, I am confident all this change is good for all of us.

We have agreed that whoever finds a job first determines the destination.  We are praying for “fulfilling employment” and by a date of April 1.  I told Dave I need to have something specific to pray about these days….I trust God completely.  My only fear comes from my own limiting beliefs, that I am learning to recognize at first ugly rearing of the head.  I have no fear about God providing or caring or loving us.

On our walk, we once again solidified our commitment to one another and the direction we are taking right now, together.  It is truly amazing that we have been married for 34+ years.  But more amazing to me is that we enjoy being married to one another!  A thought last night was that if one of us was to die in six months, would we regret this decision to move?  Both of us agreed that in that situation, we would regret not moving if we don’t.

February 17, 2008 Posted by debbiehensleigh | The decision is made | | 1 Comment

Dream of the Day

Today, I dream of working with people who are honest in their core selves.  I dream of having friends and colleagues who think deeply and wrestle with what the right thing to do actually is.  I dream of being in an environment where wrongs are righted and where offenses are acknowledged and forgiven.  I dream of relationships where the parties are secure enough that disagreements are fun.  I dream of having a daily opportunity to exchange ideas and share new thoughts and of being stimulated to go further, think deeper, run harder, laugh louder.

Being wide awake and dreaming of being in a place where our strengths are valued and celebrated and used for good is a nice way to start a Saturday in the middle of a life-changing job search.  While Dave and I are very different in so many ways, we have truly become comfortable in how we fit together.  The dream in the paragraph above exists between us….most of the time….and that is probably why I’d like so much to expand it. 

There is a good place for us that we are closing in on.  We are enjoying the process, secure in the belief that God is leading and we are willing to go–wherever.

February 2, 2008 Posted by debbiehensleigh | Deciding to move from Champaign | | No Comments Yet